So Sick @-@

On last Sunday 25/04/10, after back from lunch, I felt so cold after showering, I was trying to take a nape, putting on blanket, it just feel so cold, I felt shivering~~~Putting on another jacket to keep me warm, off the fan and rest for almost 2 hours. My lovely b was making honey drink & herbal drink when I was woke up. Feel so touched.

After dinner, he fetch me home, on the way home, he kept asking me wanna see doc??!I just wanna rest afterall. The next day, I woke up, my head was heavy & pain, feel so uncomfortable!!I was so stoned for whole working day. I decided to go for doctor, got to know I am in mild fever, & sore throat. After work, I slept at 8++pm till the next morning, I still feel the same on Tuesday, but also turn up for work. I just worked blindly for these 2 days. On Tuesday after work, I received a office call, Ah b was calling me saying that he was down stair waiting for me. To my surprised, he waited for me & brought me 'fu cha'. He send me to my car and ended I went to his house for resting. I really never thought he will come and look for me. He said I am sick needed people 's care & concern. Moreover that day was raining day and he was not very busy,also scare I will kena rain wor!!Sounded so lovely....anyway my sick is getting worsen afterall, throat is so painful ,no voice & so cold(guess haven't recover from fever yet)...Feel so heaty!!!

I blog this up, because I feel so touched and I wanna remember it forever!!!Thank you ah b, with your care, I believe I will get well very soon. Every times I wake up looking at your sleeping face, you look so chubby just like a baby. And I feel like wanna sayang you as much as I can. A million expression that cannot express through words!!!I love you very much, Ah B @-@ (Pai sei Pai sei)

不想再任性!!!And Happy Anniversary~~~

The very 1st official anniversary card from Ah B, for our 4th annivrsary--messages was so touched & there are so many 1st time in our journey @@

One dozen of red roses & 3 stalks of lily wrapped togather, really love it very much !!

I know myself very well, I am very stubborn person....When I am mad, the stubbornness will become even worse~~~Day by day, may be age keep increasing, no longer feel good on that...All walk of life, human need to been through, it is so tiring if we keep on behave like this. May be it is time to let go to make myself better & live happily.

Controlling too much is like giving a burden to yourself, instructing too much making yourself feel sickening...??!!Why not choose to pass the day with cheerful mind~~~Life is so short is just like there is how many 10 years in life?I need to learn how to give in & out to make everyone happy, if you can't change a person , why not try to change yourself !!!I learnt , not to expect to change a person but to accept it~~

Just imagine how could you able to angry for your loves one for long time, not even a single day, the heart feel so pain & face full with tearness. World become so dark~~ Everything that you do is feel so emptiness. You can't stop missing him/ her when you are trying to focus on your work!!This is how CUPID has created a HIS love~~~

Today is our anniversary 23/04/10--4th year anniversary, to my surprised, I received a bouquet of roses & lilies with attached card & printed movie ticket"When In Rome". Heart is so touched & the delivery person is the lady who is downstair my office!!!Feel pai sei to receive the flowers which it makes every lady envy of it!!!

"I always think my stubbornness can change my life, but end of the day it is a failure in my life"~~~Learn learn learn to change myself instead of changing other people!!!

I feel so worry!!!

On sunny Wednesday 14/04/10, feel so worry.....!!!The last blog that I written, I still can't forsee any charges in him. Feel so speechless. Last Saturday, we dinner with Phei Fen & Jie Fu at Conne Pizza which is in Sri Rampai. It's a very unique pizza........which we ordered to bring for his family to taste. That day we reached home about 10.30pm. I feel so tired, and slept early that day. The food was eaten by his mum, left 2 Conne Pizza. He was watching football, guess he is still betting!!!I feel disappointed but I just remain silent. I felt so fed up, he didn't even try to change. I can accept it as hobby for watching it. I think he have forgotten his promises!!!From previous conversation, he indirectly telling me that one's habit , you can't expect to be changed immediately. But did they ever try?

The next morning, his mum told that the Conne Pizza has eaten by him. At the moment, I feel so frustrated....But he act like nothing happened!!!I was angry, I know that he stay late at night sure will feel hungry. He will find food for sure!!!It's applicable to everyone, food is so tempting to him, he can't even resist!!I just want him to take care of his health.That day, I just feel like don't want to care anything anymore!!!Feel so hopeless, everyday need to remind not to do this , and to do this n that!! The feeling kinda like f*** up at times!

What is the purpose to do so? I just hope to stay in healthy lifestyle. I know food is so tempting, but of course need to control, prevent is better than cure! !Lately, I find out myself is hardly to control my emotion, at times it just break down & cry, worry sooner I will suffer with depression~~~Guess now I am in the mild depression!!!